Tuesday, May 15, 2007

8 down...12 to go!

Oh my, I'm receiving some gorgeous LO's with my MOD Kit and am just tickled pink! I'll be showcasing them all later this week and I know you'll enjoy viewing them:)
Is anyone a tag maker? Make a tag using the MOD kit and send it along...that will count too, ya' know! How about a desktop wallpaper...come on peeps...I'm trying to make this as easy as possible on you...lol

And now I'm going to share the funniest thing I've read in a long time, compliments of my brother Dean. He has the most adorable little dog named Bailey and I have 2 cats named Lucky and Bonehead so you'll see why I thought this was hilarious:)

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with my people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and Iare fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.
In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released -and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move.My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe for now...

Have a great day everyone and big hugs to ya'!


Scrapcat4914 said...

TO cute!!!
Hope you don't mind but I had to copy & paste it to email to my son & his girlfriend later today

Anonymous said...

*LOL* I think my cat wrote that one ;)

.:kristine:. said...

Have a giggle on me!!! Love ya girlie!!

A blind man is walking down the street with his seeing-eye dog one day.

They come to a busy intersection, and the dog, ignoring the high volume of
traffic zooming by on the street, leads the blind man right out into the
thick of traffic.

This is followed by the screech of tires and horns blaring as panicked
drivers try desperately not to run the pair down.

The blind man and the dog finally reach the safety of the sidewalk on the
other side of the street, and the blind man pulls a cookie out of his coat
pocket, which he offers to the dog.

A passer-by, having observed the near fatal incident, can't control his
amazement and says to the blind man, "Why on earth are you rewarding your
dog with a cookie? He nearly got you killed!"

The blind man turns partially in his direction and replies, "To find out
where his head is, so I can kick his ass."

Marta said...

The cat diary just cracked me up :)! What a hoot. I can see those kinds of thoughts rolling around in my two kitties' heads. I'd better watch out for those little carnivores. :)
Thanks for the laugh!

Nancy said...

I haven't laughed so hard in a while!! The dog diary could have been written by my dog! I don't have a cat now but have in the past and saw her pawprints all over that diary! Hilarious! Thank you for sharing those!